12.29.09

I remember exactly where I was this time last year... here, in bed. You were growing like a weed in my belly. I was so big and so uncomfortable. I'm so glad to have you here and healthy and safe. There's a part of me that really misses being pregnant with you. I never really let myself believe that you'd actually be here. I was so unhappy during my pregnancy with you. I felt like every day I dared you to live. And you were determined to be with me. I wish I'd taken more time to enjoy you. I remember feeling you move inside me, it was absolutely the most beautiful feeling I'd ever felt. I miss it SO MUCH.  If I could keep you safe inside me until you were grown... But you were grown, as grown as you could get inside me.

This time next year I want to be starting the journey all over again. I hope we'll be able to be there.

I meant to talk about your Christmas in this entry. Perhaps I'll talk about it tomorrow.

 I love you Parker!
Mommy